When thing is not working, it will never be…
After my first entry of the ‘The Single Women’s Dilemma’ series, I received a text from a familiar number. No name appeared so it was obvious that I deleted that name and that number before.
That was the beginning of everything. And indicated the ending of everything. And I must say, it happened so many times that I am exhausted to keep it calculated.
I told myself so many times before, ’Don’t succumb to it or you’ll break your heart again’.
But I must say that I am a risk taker. So I took the risk. The risk to think that ‘perhaps this time I can do it right so everything will be okay’ or the risk to lose it all and being heartbroken again. So I followed the heart and ignored the mind. Ironically saying, I am a logic person so it’s damn funny for me to just follow what my heart said.
Guess I never learned the lesson.
I remembered putting some clothes in the ‘to donate’ sections because they don’t fit me well and I simply don’t look pretty in them. But after a while, because I forgot to donate the clothes straight away, I unpacked everything and started wearing them again forgetting that the main reason they are stuffed into the boxes were because they just didn’t fit my body. And the truth is, they can never fit. And there they went again. In the boxes. To be donated.
Double stupid works done.
And now, I am looking at that simple ‘Hi’ before unpacking it again. I decided to leave it unreplied. He already has a girl who has my smile (remember?). And that is enough to make me smile with satisfaction before I touched the ‘delete’ word on the screen.
(Evil thought) I always knew it. He never forgets.